*** The wonderful art of spanking, performed at its best. *** The COF (Comité Olympique pour les Fessees, the Olympic committee for spankings) organises the Spanking Olympic Games at four-year intervals, each edition to be held in a different city. The Games of the 28th Spanking Olympiad take place in ROME, Italy. The opening ceremony, to be held on September 13, features an artistic and musical programme of great variety, going from the history of the COF to a fictional re-enactment of the ancient Roman tradition of flogging students in schools, probably the first recorded instance of ritual spanking in human history along with its Greek and Nordic counterparts. Punishment is not the goal of the COF, though, especially when applied to non-consenting parts. The Games mean to promote and favour the professional and amateurish practice of mutually consensual spanking activity in a competitive but safe environment. Being that it is a strenuous physical task, as well as a fulfilling personal accomplishment, spanking is regarded as a sport. In strict collaboration with the CIO (Comité Internationale Olympique), the COF works so that most of the traditional Olympic competitions are imitated and adapted to the wonderful world of spanking.
This is the logo of the Spanking Olympics as designed by Pierre de Culertin himself in 1895, the year before the first Olympiad. The COF still clings to it as a sign of the time-honoured tradition that is professional and amateurish spanking.
Many persons can participate in the Games. The goal of Pierre de Culertine, the founder of COF, was to include as many people as possible while maintaining what he thought was 'the natural order of things' – a man spanking a woman, and a young boy spanking a young girl. But since the Games of the 3rd Spanking Olympiad in München (1904), other pairings have been allowed as well. Samesex pairings were introduced as of the Games in Oslo1952. Nowadays, each and every pairing is allowed, but still, not in every occasion. Tradition and safety measures have imposed that certain sports and competitions be reserved for adults, or for youngsters. But all of the performances in Games can count on the same basic motivation: the never-ending, immortal Olympic spirit. 1a.
Categories of Participants
People (= 'athletes') wishing to attend the Games of the 28th Spanking Olympiad must first sign up to the WUSS (World United Spanking Society), the organisation for amateur and professional spankers and spankees to be officially registered and identified. The proof of subscription, along with other documents such as ID and responsibility release, must then be submitted to the COF, which will rate the person’s eligibility for the Games. Upon subscription, each athlete is placed in one of the six recipients that the COF allows. No other individual is admitted at the Games as participants. The recipients are: – Senior Male (M): every male individual of 18 years of age or older. – Senior Female (F): every female individual of 18 years of age or older. – Junior Female (f): every female individual aged between 13 and 17 years. – Junior Male (m): every male individual aged between 13 and 17 years. – Referee: any individual, aged 25 or older, wishing to assist the COF in the activities of judging, evaluating, assigning points and sanctions during the Games. Referees cannot also be placed in other recipients. – Assistant: any individual, male or female and aged between 25 and 75, who wishes to volunteer as a helper for the athletes in the competitions. 1b.
Each athlete represents a country and can attend the Games performing for that country only. There are no exceptions.
The participants to the Games of the 28th Spanking Olympiad must be rated sane and healthy by a medical official affiliated with the COF. The exact requirements will be valued by the single officials; however, general guidelines are as follows.
Each active participant (M, F, m, f): – must report no illnesses that might prevent the correct performance in the Games; – must prove to be attending the Games on their own free will. Any coercion, intended as physical and/or psychological influence by other individuals, is not accepted. Particular care in this should be put by the COF medical officials when dealing with 'm' and 'f' athletes; – must not have a family history of heart diseases or any other permanent condition; – must prove able to sustain without permanent physical/psychological damage, and without support, the equivalent of 2000m of continued running (2 kilometres, approx. 1,50 miles), and pass a standard breathing test once a day for a week (see COF Officials’ Handbook for details).
The Games are not precluded by default to those suffering from debilitating physical conditions. However, certain restrictions do apply in order to ensure the safety of the participants. More specifically: – the ability to move on one’s own is indispensable for Figure, Struggle and Implement sports. Those lacking such ability will not be able to take part in such sports. See Section 3 for further details on Sports and Competitions; – the usage of both arms is indispensable for Figure and Struggle sports. Those lacking such ability will not be able to take part in such sports. See Section 3 for further details; – the ability to see is indispensable in all competitions if the participant is a spanker. If the participant is a spankee, the ability to see is indispensable for Figure, Struggle and Implement sports. Those lacking such ability will not be able to take part in such sports. See Section 3 for further details; – the ability to hear or speak is not indispensable in any competitions. The hearing or speaking impaired will be able to attend the Games regularly.
SPORTS AND COMPETITIONS of the GAMES OF THE 28TH SPANKING OLYMPIAD
A ‘competition’ is a single challenge where contenders perform in collaboration and/or against each other in a branch of the spanking world. A ‘sport’ is that particular branch. A practical example from the regular Olympics: Swimming is a sport; 200m Freestyle Men is a competition. Most competitions in the Spanking Olympics require a couple to participate, while others are a one-on-one challenge. More details follow. The first person or couple in each competition is awarded a glowing, painted, steely coin: the crimson medal. The second is awarded an evenly light red medal. The third is awarded a rosy pink medal. Prizes in money are awarded as well, depending on the athlete’s World Ranking (see further on). Amateurs winning a competition will be offered the chance to turn pro. 3a.
Athletes performing in couples must be paired from the beginning, since acceptance to the Games. While an athlete can be a part of different pairings, a pairing must be formed by the same partners throughout. Athletes performing solo are not subject to any restriction. A team is allowed to replace only one athlete throughout the Games. A solo athlete performs against another solo athlete in a series of one-on-one challenges that will eventually lead to the finals. A couple is made of two partners, a spanker and a spankee, performing in co-operation against other couples. This may take place in a many-against-many type of game (i.e., race) or in a couple-against-couple, direct match challenge eventually leading to the finals. A team consists in a group of four or five athletes competing together against other teams. Same rules as for couples apply. 3b.
Sports and Respective Competitions
The typical spanking is a one-on-one act. However, the Games present several sports and competitions which alter this time-honoured method, creating interesting variations on the same theme and still trying to join the classic with the modern. Sports are particular branches of the spanking world, identified by something peculiar that cannot be found in other sports. Competitions, on the other hand, are specialities identified by category (age, sex, weight, etc.) and type of action (pairings, single, time-depending races, etc). Another good comparison is: Athletics = sport. 100m Men = competition. Here follows a complete list of the competitions available in the Games, sorted by sports.
Endurance E.1) E.2) E.3) E.4) E.5) E.6) E.7) E.8)
10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10
Minutes Minutes Minutes Minutes Minutes Minutes Minutes Minutes
M/F F/M F/F M/M f/m m/f f/f m/m
E.9) 20 Minutes M/F E.10) 20 Minutes F/M E.11) 20 Minutes F/F E.12) 20 Minutes M/M E.13) 20 Minutes f/m E.14) 20 Minutes m/f E.15) 20 Minutes f/f E.16) 20 Minutes m/m
E.17) E.18) E.19) E.20)
Last Last Last Last
Man Man Man Man
Spanking Spanking Spanking Spanking
M/F F/M M/M F/F
Figure F.1) Team Dance M F.2) Team Dance F F.3) Team Dance m F.4) Team Dance f F.5) Spanking Gymnastics M/F F.6) Spanking Gymnastics F/M F.7) Spanking Gymnastics m/f F.8) Spanking Gymnastics f/m F.9) Spanking Gymnastics Rhythmic m/f F.10) Spanking Gymnastics Rhythmic f/m
Implement I.1) I.2) I.3) I.4) I.5) I.6) I.7) I.8)
Paddle M/F Paddle F/M Paddle F/F Paddle M/M Hairbrush M/F Hairbrush F/M Hairbrush F/F Hairbrush M/M
I.17) I.18) I.19) I.20) I.21) I.22) I.23) I.24)
Paddle m/f Paddle f/m Paddle f/f Paddle m/m Hairbrush m/f Hairbrush f/m Hairbrush f/f Hairbrush m/m
I.9) Belt M/F I.10) Belt F/M I.11) Belt F/F I.12) Belt M/M I.13) Cane M/F I.14) Cane F/M I.15) Cane F/F I.16) Cane M/M I.25) I.26) I.27) I.28)
Belt Belt Belt Belt
m/f f/m f/f m/m
Relay R.1) R.2) R.3) R.4) R.5) R.6) R.7) R.8)
M Spanker Relay F Spanker Relay m Spanker Relay f Spanker Relay M Spankee Relay F Spankee Relay m Spankee Relay f Spankee Relay
R.9) Senior Spanker Mixed Relay R.10) Senior Spankee Mixed Relay R.11) Junior Spanker Mixed Relay R.12) Junior Spankee Mixed Relay
M/FFFF F/MMMM m/ffff f/mmmm FFFF/M MMMM/F ffff/m mmmm/f X/XXXX XXXX/X x/xxxx xxxx/x
Marathon M.1) Marathon (M/F, F/M)
Sprint SP.1) SP.2) SP.3) SP.4) SP.5) SP.6) SP.7) SP.8)
Sprint Sprint Sprint Sprint Sprint Sprint Sprint Sprint
1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1
Minute Minute Minute Minute Minute Minute Minute Minute
M/F F/M M/M F/F f/m m/f f/f m/m
SP.9) Sprint 2 Minutes M/F SP.10) Sprint 2 Minutes F/M SP.11) Sprint 2 Minutes M/M SP.12) Sprint 2 Minutes F/F SP.13) Sprint 2 Minutes f/m SP.14) Sprint 2 Minutes m/f SP.15) Sprint 2 Minutes f/f SP.16) Sprint 2 Minutes m/m
Struggle ST.1) ST.2) ST.3) ST.4) ST.5)
Struggle Struggle Struggle Struggle Struggle
50-65kg Juniors 66-80kg Juniors 81-100kg Juniors 101-115kg Juniors 116-130kg Juniors
ST.10) Wild Struggle Juniors
ST.6) ST.7) ST.8) ST.9)
Struggle Struggle Struggle Struggle
50-75kg Seniors 76-100kg Seniors 101-125kg Seniors 126-150kg Seniors
ST.11) Wild Struggle Seniors
SPRINT (for couples)
COMPETITIONS: Sprint 1 Minute ALLOWED PAIRINGS: All.
The spanker delivers as many spanks as possible to the spankee in the given time span, starting and ending with a Referee’s signal. Every spank must apply a force to the spankee’s bottom of at least 500g (approx. 1 oz.) for Seniors and of at least 350g (approx. 0,75 oz.) for Juniors. Such force is measured by an electrified support that the spanker must wear on his or her hand. The count of smacks is digitally kept.
Four preliminary heats are held, each consisting in eight couples (sixteen athletes). The first three from each heat, plus the four best repechages, advance to semi-finals. Each semi-final is made of eight couples (sixteen athletes), and the four best from each advance to finals. The medal bout plays on a time span twice as long as the preliminary.
All spanks must be delivered to the full bottom only. No exception. Smacking of the thighs or the lower back will automatically result in disqualifying.
All sessions must be performed in the traditional over-the-knee position, with the spanker sitting on a large, low arm-less couch and the spankee bent over the lap. The spankee’s upper half must rest on the couch, aside the spanker. That the spanker is righthanded or left-handed is irrelevant. However, only one hand may be used throughout the competition. Usage of the other hand, however partial, will automatically result in disqualifying for the couple.
NOTABLE WORLD RECORDS:
– Sprint 2 Minutes.
James Garfield delivered 427 smacks-per-minute (an amazing 7.8 smacks-per-second) to Annie Arron in Moscow 1976. The American couple won the Sprint 1 Minute, and then went on to win the Sprint 2 Minutes as well. Such performance has never been repeated.
In San Francisco 2000, 62-year-old Garry Inglewood spanked Geri Hall with the impressive rate of 7.5 smacks-per-second, in the Sprint 1 Minute competition. The record was never recorded though, and the couple was disqualified when doping issues were discovered during blood tests. Many wondered how such an aged man (winner of the Endurance, again with Ms. Hall, 40 years earlier in Beijing) could have achieved such a result. See Section 6 on Doping and Safety Measures for more on this topic.
STRUGGLE (for singles)
COMPETITIONS: See Section 3 to learn more about the many types of competition. ALLOWED PAIRINGS: Seniors with Seniors, Juniors with Juniors. Sex is irrelevant.
This sports requires the spankee to not submit voluntarily to the spanking, but rather try and escape from it. Spankers win if they manage to deliver at least fifteen smacks within the predetermined time limit. Spankees win if the spankers do not manage. This makes it automatically a game for singles competing one-on-one, and not for couples.
There is no discrimination basing on sex: athletes can meet opponents of their own sex, or of the other. However, three basic distinctions are made: Age, Weight and Role. –
Age: 'M' and 'F' athletes compete in the Senior category. 'm' and 'f' athletes compete in the Junior category. No exceptions allowed under any circumstances.
Weight: every athlete can only compete in his or her weight category. Weight categories go as listed above. The Age rule still applies.
Role: the distinction made is basic. Every athlete is either a Spanker or a Spankee. Again, being 'M', 'F', 'm' or 'f' is irrelevant: there can be M/F or m/f or F/F pairings, and so on, provided that the Age and Weight rules still apply.
Throughout the competitions and categories, the goal of the Struggle is always the same: the spanker must try and deliver fifteen smacks to the spankee within the given time limit, starting and ending with a Referee’s signal. For a spank to count as delivered, it must be applied with a force of at least 500g (approx. 1 oz.) for Seniors and of at least 350g (approx. 0,75 oz.) for Juniors. Such force is measured by an electrified support that the spanker must wear on his or her hand.
Struggle – In the main, weight-based competitions, spankees start the game over the spankers’ lap, and they must try and struggle free within the allowed minute – or at least to squirm in such fashion that the spanker’s attempt to deliver fifteen proper smacks fails. 32 athletes are admitted to each of these competitions. Paired in twos, 16 advance to second round. Again paired, 8 advance to quarterfinals, the winners of which proceed to semi-finals. Finals for 1st place, and the 3rd place bout, are then held.
Wild Struggle – This competition is different. The given time is two minutes instead of one. Spanker and spankee start from opposite sides of the same room, and before trying to deliver the required fifteen smacks, the spanker must first take a hold of the spankee. Contrarily to other competitions, the position in which the spanks are delivered is irrelevant: standing, crouching, laying, sitting, in mid-air.. there is no difference. The road to the finals is the same as in the regular Struggle.
The Struggle in general is the only Olympic sports where people playing in two different roles can prevail. In other words, the finals for the 1st place is held between a spanker and a spankee, only one of which will prevail. So far, in the previous 27 editions of the Spanking Olympics a spankee has obtained victory in fifteen occasions. Eighteen times out of twenty-seven the podium has seen two spankers, meaning that the 3rd place bout is often won by an athlete of this role.
At the start of each round, athletes form two pools, one for spankers and one for spankees. From there, they are picked at random to form pairs. Should, at any time, the number of available spankers and spankees be odd and not even, those athletes who lost the previous round with the lowest score differential will benefit from a repechage.
NOTABLE WORLD RECORDS:
At the 24th Spanking Olympics of 1956, in Riyadh, the great local mistress Saifa Al Sadehr (SAU) won four out of five Struggle categories for Seniors; she had the best over 11 male spankees and 8 females; in the Wild Struggle finals she was defeated by Anyanka Privalova (URS).
The most successful struggling spankee was Stefan Olsson (SWE), who won the Wild Struggle in three consecutive Olympics, from 1924 through 1932 (in Helsinki, Malmö, Tokyo/Osaka). He also won five other miscellaneous competitions in the same years.
In Montevideo 1980, 14-year-old identical twins Costinha Pedro and Ana Lucilla da Rosa (BRA) met in the finals of the 66-80kg Struggle for Juniors, and also in the finals of the Wild Struggle for Juniors. Lucilla (spankee) won both times. She was nicknamed 'The Squish' for her ability to escape everyone’s grab in less than two seconds. A handful for her parents, indeed!
ENDURANCE (for couples)
COMPETITIONS: Endurance 10 Minutes – Endurance 20 minutes – Last Man Spanking. ALLOWED PAIRINGS: All (Last Man Spanking is a common pool, for Seniors only).
The goal of Endurance is to present long and very long spankings in various fashions. Partners within a couple compete in co-operation with each other and against other couples. Starting with a Referee’s sign, the spanker starts the spanking, that must continue for 10 or 20 minutes, depending on the competition the couple is in. At the end of the allowed time, the smacks delivered to each spankee are counted. The best four in each of the two heats advance to finals.
As always, for a spank to count it must be applied with a force of at least 500g (approx. 1 oz.) for Seniors and of at least 350g (approx. 0,75 oz.) for Juniors. Such force is measured by an electrified support that the spanker must wear on his or her hand.
The category Last Man Spanking presents a yet different and original concept. Couples must proceed with the spanking for as long as they can without interruptions. The rules for valid smacks are the same as stated above. Eight couples in all can participate. The last couple still involved in the spanking when all others have given up, wins. If after two hours more than one couple is still standing, a ‘spank off’ will be held.
Partners in a couple may be 'M' or 'F' indifferently. 'm' and 'f' are not allowed into this competition, which is considered too proving for youngsters to bear.
Intervals between smacks cannot be longer than one second up to the first hour of competition, and not longer than half a second in the last hour.
The eight participating couples are selected according to the results scored in the last year before the Olympics, especially during the Spanking World League, the European Championship and the American League of Many Spanks (ALMS). Not less than one and no more than two couples per continent are allowed anyway.
NOTABLE WORLD RECORDS:
10 Minutes M/F: 2518 smacks, avg. 4,2 smacks-per-second (Garry Inglewood spanks Geri Hall, GBR – Beijing 1960)
10 Minutes F/M: 2411 smacks, avg. 4,0 smacks-per-second (Irina Ludmechka spanks Stanislaw Onatopp, KAZ – San Francisco 2000)
20 Minutes f/m: 3708 smacks, avg. 3,1 smacks-per-second (Amanda Santander  spanks Ramòn Santander , ESP – Madrid 1984)
20 Minutes m/f: 3655 smacks, avg. 3,0 smacks-per-second (Giuseppe Franzoni  spanks Giulia Marini , ITA – Beijing 1960)
Last Man Spanking: after 2 hours, 20007 smacks given, avg. 2,8 smacks-per-second (Francis Foster spanks Julio Mechoso, USA – Pyongyang 1992)
MARATHON (for couples)
In the regular Olympic Games, the marathon consists in 42,195km (forty-two kilometres and 195 metres, approx. 26 miles). It serves as a re-enactment of the sacrifice of the soldier who supposedly ran from the battlefield of Marathon to Athens to give the news of the triumph over the Spartan army, and died upon arrival after whispering the word ‘victory!’ with his last breath.
F/M, F/F, M/F, M/M (all competing in the same pool).
The Spanking Olympics make their own re-enactment. In the American city of Baton Rouge, in 1819, several witnesses reported they saw a father spanking his daughter for close on four hours. The poor teenager was barely alive when someone had the sense of stopping the insane man. To remember such a gruesome event, the Spanking Olympics present the marathon.
It has been calculated, basing on the few existing records, that the insane man must have hit his daughter something like forty thousand times. So, also in order to rejoice with traditions, the Spanking Olympics marathon is a competition where the spanker must deliver exactly 42,195 smacks to the spankee in the shortest possible time. An unlimited number of couples can attend, and the only restriction for what concerns the sex and the roles of the athletes is that only Seniors can participate. Since the original episode involved a minor, no minor is to attend this competition.
For a spank to count it must be applied with a force of at least 350g (approx. 0,75 oz.), inferior to the usual 500g given the expected length of the competition. Such force is measured by an electrified support that the spanker must wear on his or her hand.
NOTABLE WORLD RECORDS:
– In Florence 1964, Hanna Karlovy spanked Hristo Cseh (HUN) 42,195 times in 3h 58m 7s, delivering an average of 3,0 smacks-per-second and setting the world record.
– In Oslo 1952, Mark Andrews spanked Jennifer Henstridge (USA) 42,195 times in 4h 7m, delivering an average of 2,8 smacks-per-second and setting the Olympic record, that was to be wiped out by Karlovy-Cseh twelve years later.
FIGURE (for teams)
Team Dance – Spanking Gymnastics – Spanking Gymnastics Rhythmic TD teams: F, M, f, m – SG: F/M, M/F, m/f, f/m – SR: m/f, f/m
The goal of Figure sports is to act out spanking in various fashions. Teams or couples can compete, and a jury of Referees awards points in Style and Content.
Team Dance – This competition features the contemporaneous exhibition of the four athletes forming a team. The teams can be made of Senior Males or Senior Females. Each team must present an exercise that actively involves all four participants and which contents allude in one way or the other to spanking. The traditional bottom-smacking between team members is allowed without restriction. Theoretically, an exercise can be composed entirely of spanking, even though the Referees tend to privilege artistry over predictability. See more about the awarding of points further on in this chapter.
Spanking Gymnastics – This competition is for mixed-sex couples, but Seniors with Seniors, and Juniors with Juniors. It works exactly like Team Dance, but is limited to two athletes interacting with each other. The basic difference, though, is that in Gymnastics the explicitly spanking-related content is highly favoured. As long as it includes a technical routine as well (again, see further on), even a ‘simple’ spanking is welcome.
Spanking Gymnastics Rhythmic – In Montreal 1944, over 75% of the Senior male (M) gymnasts were involved in World War II. Much attention was then given to the youngsters categories, and the success was so high that from 1948 on the COF chose to reserve this competition for 'm' and 'f' athletes alone.
Rhythmic is probably the most spectacular of the Olympic competitions, and focuses on the interaction between the two partners and selected implements (named 'tools', not to
be mistaken with those in the Implement sports). The spanker and the spankee play with a Belt, a Paddle and a Light Cane. Smacks must be applied with such tools, and never with the bare hand. A continued spanking is not allowed, since every smack has to follow strict technical rules, and still conform to the artistic programme. •
'Style' points reward the technical impression of the exercise, that must follow certain canons: synchronicity (especially in Team Dance), plasticity, posture, composure, equilibrium, grace. Every exercise has its own starting value, usually 100.00, and penalties are detracted if and as they are committed. 'Content' points concern the artistic impression of the exercise and are awarded by Referees as they see fit, up to a maximum of 25.00. They have no starting value, and are an addition to the technical score. Given the high standard of preparation usually achieved by Olympic athletes, the artistic content often determines a couple or a team’s victory over the opponents. The ability to capture the essence and the beauty of spanking is more often than not the key impression.
NOTABLE WORLD RECORDS:
– No world records are held officially. Nonetheless, during the Games of Montreal in 1944, the Soviet couple made by siblings Sergej Rozhenko [17, spanker] and Yuliya Rozhenkova [16, spankee] made it to three straight 125.00 scores in preliminaries, semifinals and finals, winning the crowd’s enthusiasm and favouring the Rhythmic to become a competition for youngsters only. Yuliya went on to win two more Olympics as a Senior, with near-full scores, and is unanimously regarded as the best spanking gymnast to have ever performed. She retired at the age of 37.
IMPLEMENT (for couples)
COMPETITIONS: Paddle, Hairbrush, Belt, Cane ALLOWED PAIRINGS: Cane: all Senior pairings –
others: all pairings.
The Implement competitions are held last in the Games because they somewhat summarise all that has been done thus far. Invented by famous British spankee Ronald D. Holloway, they are a fine mixture of sports such as Endurance and Figure, with a touch of Sprint. The so-called Implementist is traditionally an all-around athlete, capable of embodying the characteristics of an endurer, a sprinter and a figurer. This applies to spankers and spankees alike.
Other sports either focus on technical-artistic content or on timed performances, but the goal in Implement is to deliver a thorough spanking with the aid of a tool, attempting to achieve a good technique, a good timing and last but not least a good artistic impression.
Couples place themselves in the designated area as they see fit, disposing of props such as chairs, beds, stools, desks, etc. Positions may be change freely. The spanker must start the exercise with a hand-spanking to the clothed bottom, then proceed to the baring and then finish with the implement. The way the spankee is handled, and the way he or she reacts to the spanker’s orders and ministrations, are to be performed smooth and without incidents. Points in Style are awarded, starting from 0.00 up to a maximum of 125.00.
The length of the hand-spanking is free, but the implement-aided part must follow certain canons. Number of smacks that must be delivered are as follows. Seniors: 200 paddle, 200 belt, 400 hairbrush, 100 cane. Juniors: 100 paddle, 100 belt, 200 hairbrush. One should also note that the weight and measurements of belts and paddles vary from Seniors to Juniors, while hairbrushes stay unaltered. The cane, then, is for Seniors only.
Style points are not only awarded to the antics and the hand-spanking part (also including how the spanker keeps the spankee in place, how the restraining is done, how effi-
ciently the spankee pretends to struggle, etc.), but also to the implement-aided part, which then scores additional points on its own. Every smack is considered 'given' following the usual rules. The predetermined number of spanks must be delivered in the shortest possible time, but every infraction will cost Style points. The spanker’s arm must be swung in a smooth arc, the implement’s impact must be full and not partial, the spankee’s bottom’s colour should preferably be uniform, and so on. Referees decide. While it is good to make it a fast spanking, it is even better to make it a pretty fast, rich and well-delivered spanking. Referees tend to value Style points over time infractions. •
The spankee must cry. There are no if’s and but’s: there must be real tears, that are promptly examined by a small sensor placed on the floor or on the piece of furniture beneath the spankee’s head. Spankees’ failure to cry results in a penalty of 10.00 points, that are detracted from the overall result.
Scening is allowed and encouraged, especially since 'Style' points also keep track of how efficient the couple is at portraying an actual spanking. So it is highly recommended to couples to ‘play the game’ as much as possible. Good ways to do so are if the spankee feigns struggles and protests (but not enough to distract the spanker from the job, since that might cost him/her Style points), if the spanker scolds (but not too much, or the Referees will be annoyed), if a proper background story to the spanking is provided (mentions of a parental relationship between the spanker and the spankee are allowed).
NOTABLE WORLD RECORDS:
– No world records are held officially. In the 1972 Olympics in Nairobi, the local team (Kipkala, Kiptanui, Onubi, Williams) won the Team Dance in Figure, and three out of four team members (Kiptanui, Williams and Onubi) also won the Belt and Paddle competitions in Implement. Kiptanui and Onubi (F/F) scored 124.00 in Paddle, while Onubi and Williams (F/M) scored 123.50 in Belt.
– In the 1996 Olympics in Athens, Italian couple Andrea Rossi [14/m, spanker] and Lucia Pescaresi [16/f, spankee] triumphed in the Hairbrush competition for youngsters 'whipping up' a perfect 125.00, the maximum possible score given their exercise. They also achieved second place in the Belt competition, but with reversed roles. Pescaresi also won the Cane competition in the Senior category four years later, in San Francisco, with spankee partner Giulio Agresti. She is currently one of the most awarded ‘switches’.
RELAY (for teams)
M Spanker/ee Relay – F Spanker/ee Relay – m Spanker/ee Relay – f Spanker/ee Relay – Senior Spanker/ee Mixed Relay – Junior Spanker/ee Mixed Relay (Please refer to the 'Sports and Respective Competitions' paragraph labelled as 3b for further information on the allowed pairings and types of competition.)
Relays are basically Sprint competitions for teams and not for couples. The goal is to deliver four consecutive spankings in the shortest possible time. A team is made of five members: four spankees and a spanker in the Spanker competitions, four spankers and a spankee in the Spankee competitions. Competitions are divided according to the team’s captain’s sex – the captain being the one whose role is different from the others’. The other team members’ sex must be opposite as the captain’s, except for the Mixed Relays.
For example, in a typical Female Spanker Relay competition (F/MMMM), the team captain is an Senior Female. In the first fragment, she must deliver 100 (one hundred) spanks to the first Senior Male spankee in the shortest possible time. Spanks are considered valid in the usual way. Upon completion, the first spankee crawls off her lap and
the second one lays over. The third and the fourth follow. Other teams do the same, and the times are calculated. Four heats with eight teams each are held; the first four teams from each heat advance to semi-finals (2 x 8 teams). Again the first four from each semifinal advance to finals, where medals are assigned. This method works for all Relays.. •
.. except for the Mixed Relay. While the fundamentals are the same, the basic difference is that team members can organise themselves as they see fit. For example, in the Junior Spankee Mixed Relay, a Junior is chosen as spankee and captain, and four more are chosen as spankers. The sex of the captain and the other members is irrelevant. Only Age and Role are. Mixed Relays can be for Senior or Juniors, and centred on Spankers or Spankees just like regular Relays. The road to finals is also unaltered.
NOTABLE WORLD RECORDS:
British accountant Annette Sheridan is unanimously considered the best Relay spanker to have ever performed. She won the F Spanker Relay in both Berlin 1936 and Johannesburg 1940, always with the same team (Johnny O’Malley, Gary Hogan, Noel Sterling and Matthew Thomas). In 1940 the team established the world record, with Sheridan delivering the impressive average of 6,8 spanks-per-second throughout the four fragments, for a total of 1632 spanks in 4 minutes.
The story of the Newman siblings is probably the most interesting one linked to the Spanking Olympics, and it deserves to be told.. Born in Texas, Alison, Julia, Claudia, Holly and Mark Newman are quintets. They were raised with strict corporal punishment by their parents – who also forced them to compete in the Games of Perth 1968. The officials who should have made sure that such a thing would not happen, and failed to notice such coercion, have long been expelled from the COF. After failing the Team Dance in Figure, the Newman siblings formed an irresistible Junior Male Spanker Relay team (m/ffff). They were 13 at the time, and won the crimson medal. Their complete lack of enthusiasm, even during the victory ceremony, aroused suspicion and brought to the uncovering of their troubled family history. But for one reason or the other, things wouldn’t change. Partly, at least. Four years later, the Newmans repeated the triumph in Nairobi 1972. Julia and Holly also won the f/f Sprint 1 Minute. Again it was voiced that their parents, who were also their official trainers, were forcing them to attend. The quintets wouldn’t answer such questions. But the following year, the Newman siblings filed a lawsuit against their parents for the abusive regime of discipline inflicted upon them as youngsters, inclusive as it was of what a jury of experts defined 'physical and psychological abuse'. Nonetheless, their career as professional spankers and spankees had taken off already, and in Moscow 1976 they again triumphed in the Mixed Relay, for Seniors this time. The four girls also won the Team Dance in Figure, and Mark and Claudia reached the finals of the F/M Sprint 2 Minutes. Throughout Montevideo 1980 and Madrid 1984 the Newmans won the stunning number of 8 more medals, that went to enrich the already copious family Olympic treasure. Dublin 1988 was the last Olympics for the Newmans, who won three more medals before retiring for life at the age of 33. Especially Alison – who also attended the M/F Sprint 1 Minute with her husband Carl – clearly stated that their kids (11-year-old Regina and 10-year-old Christian) would never participate in the Games. And in fact there was no Newman in Pyongyang 1992, and thus ended one of the greatest dynasties in the history of Spanking Olympics. Holly and Mark Newman currently work for the COF as officials, making sure that no one, especially Juniors, is forced to attend the Games against their consent.
While the concept of spanking itself is rather easy to grasp, its performance in the times, spaces and manners of the Games is not quite as intuitive. Hence this section, dedicated to the practical ways of applying what has been explained thus far. 4a.
Athletes must conform to standard clothing imposed by the COF for all competitions, the Figure and Implement performances being the only (partial) exception. The standard outfit for males and females of any age is a two-piece, body-tight outfit made of cotton and acrylic and identified by the country’s flag colours. The shirt, actually a corset, is short-sleeved for males and sleeveless for females. Males wear knee-cut shorts can easily be pulled down for spanking access. Females wear a thigh-long skirt. No underwear is allowed, but athletes must wear a thong: while the buttocks must be fully visible, there are parts of the human anatomy that people just do not need to see, especially live on TV. Clothing in Figure and Implement is unrestricted, provided that the thong requirement is met. Such freedom of outfit is left to the athletes in order to favour the scening, something that Referees in the jury highly value. To dress as a camp worker in overalls, or as a schoolgirl, is something that athletes are recommended to use in order to enhance their performance – and that people like to see anyway, for it is a good mix between sports and tradition. All free clothing is, however, subject to scrutiny before approval: no excessively ‘daring’ outfits are accepted, especially if worn by minors. 4b.
Spanking is traditionally performed in the Over-The-Knee (OTK) position, with the spanker sitting on a chair or a couch or a bed and the spankee draped over his or her lap. However, such tradition may not always be comfortable or practical for athletes in the Games. Therefore, most competitions have their own requirements for what concerns positioning, and unless specified, they must be met. Sports such as Sprint and Endurance have the spanker sitting on a small couch, 40 centimetres high and wide (16 inches) and 150cm long (60'). Spankees can either be placed across the spanker’s knees, or rest their head and occasionally upper body on the couch surface. This offers a very practical position as well as a quite comfortable one for both parties. In Endurance, couches are a few centimetres longer to allow spankees to rest their whole body on the cushions if they so wish: to be bent head-down for twenty minutes, or even for two or more hours in the case of Last Man Spanking and Marathon, may be dangerous. In sports like Figure and Implement, the choice is left to the athletes. The only restrictions concern the position during certain spanking acts – to deliver a belt spanking OTK, for example, is often considered ‘un-aesthetic’. The positioning in Relay is special in its own way. In Spanker Relay competitions, the couch is replaced by a large arm-less chair, and the four spankees line up aside it waiting to go over the spanker’s lap. Once a fragment is over with, the spankee crawls off the lap and the following one goes over. In the Spankee Relay competition, the couch is instead very long (approximately 10 metres, or 33 feet): the four spankers sit side by side and properly distanced from each other, and the spankee is ‘passed along’ from one to the other.
The Games of the 28th Spanking Olympiad are held in Rome, Italy. Contrarily to the regular Games, the Spanking Olympics are mostly held in-doors, though technically, nothing prevents the competitions from being performed outside. More in detail, here follows a list of sports, competitions and the actual places (stadiums, arenas, halls..) where they will be hosted. Also follows a list of facilities to welcome the athletes. 5a.
ENDURANCE – The Endurance competitions are held at Palazzo dello Sport (sports palace) in the modernistic EUR neighbourhood. It can contain up to 15,000 spectators. FIGURE – The Figure competitions are held at Palazzetto dello Sport (the smaller sports palace) in downtown. It can contain up to 5,000 spectators and has always been traditionally dedicated to gymnastics and figure sports in general. IMPLEMENT – The Implement competitions are held in the halls and yards of Castel Sant’Angelo, near St. Peter. A maximum-security prison in the Middle Age, this classic, historical setting is able to host performers and crowd alike. MARATHON – To remember the extremely suggestive arrival of the marathon in the regular Olympics of 1960, the Marathon in these Games is held at the Arco di Trionfo (triumphal arc) on the Appian Way. RELAY – The Relay competitions are held at the Colosseum, that will be appropriately covered for the occasion: can’t have rain disturb the play. Relay matches are hosted where gladiators used to fight, and the crowd is accommodated in the stands. SPRINT –
Half of the Sprint competitions are also held at the Colosseum, but at night instead of daytime. The other half is held at the Olympic Stadium, during daytime, and again after the arena has been appropriately covered. STRUGGLE –
The Struggle competitions are held in Terme di Caracalla (the thermal palace built by Roman Emperor Caracalla), where in the regular Olympics in 1960 the catch and fight matches were hosted. 5b.
Hosting for Athletes
Spankers, spankees and respective families and entourage are hosted at the Olympic Village in the Flaminio neighbourhood, where athletes dwelt in the regular Olympics of 1960. Athletes are granted freedom of practice, provided that the local inhabitants are not excessively disturbed! They can also dispose of the little arena named Stadio de’ Marmi (marble stadium), where they have free, undisturbed outdoor space far from prying eyes. The Olympic Village is made of houses, apartments and bungalows, so no catering service is provided by the COF. However, nearby bars, pubs and restaurants offer extremely discounted prices to the participants.
DOPING AND SAFETY MEASURES
Every form of doping is absolutely forbidden. Dopes, medicines, drugs and every kind of substance aiming to reinforce the athlete’s natural strength and resistance is not permitted. The free assumption of sugar and water before the competition is permitted, under a Referee’s supervision. 6a.
In general, the COF sticks to the so-called principle of NBA ('Not Before: After!'), meaning that the some products are permitted after the end of the competition, and not before. This is because often, especially after particularly long or hard spankings, athletes may be in need of immediate re-hydration or other energising measures – eating sugary food and various vitamin integrators are the most common. But even those, if taken before the competition, risk to enhance performance beyond reasonable limits, and are therefore forbidden. Blood and urine tests are conducted after every round of competition, for all athletes. The medical facilities are different for Seniors and Juniors, for males and females. Positive result to a test is examined by the COF medical committee, and upon infringement of the rule, the athlete is disqualified on the spot and expelled from the current Games. So far, the impressive number of 474 athletes have incurred in such disciplinary sanctions during the past 27 editions of the Spanking Olympics Games. Sadly, a good 10% were Juniors. On average, a doped athlete is banned from competitions for two to three years. 6b.
In addition to athletes, Referees and onlookers (crowd), a well-furnished group of Assistants also attends every competition. The Assistants expertise in making sure the rules are followed and making sure the athletes are not taking any risk for their safety. Being that certain competition require extremely long or quite hard spankings, the safety of participants may be in danger at times, and the Assistants have the power to suspend a performance in case they notice an SPV (Safety Protocols Violation). Given the athletes’ high level of preparation and experience, this has rarely happened in the past, but it has been necessary especially in the Implement sports and especially in the Juniors categories. The level of tolerance is left to the single Assistants and the single situations, but in general, heavy colouring of the buttocks and bruising are fine. Anything more requires an immediate halt to the competition for that individual/couple/team. 6c.
These instruments are used in order to measure the pressure applied by the spanker’s hand to the spankee’s bottom, and also to keep count of the smacks appropriately delivered. They are extremely thin layers of Mylar (a nylon-similar compound) that spankers must wear on the palm of their spanking hand, like the front of a glove. They feel like a second skin and pose no threat or hassle at all. A small wire connects the layer to a pad worn on the arm, where a chip is embedded to perform the necessary calculations. Referees control the correct functioning of electrified supports, which are however highly automated.
Here follows a complete list of the past editions of the Games of the Spanking Olympics. 1st
New York, USA
Mexico City, Mexico
Johannesburg, South Africa
London, Great Britain
Riyadh, Saudi Arabia
Pyongyang, Popular Republic of Korea
San Francisco, USA
Prague, Czech Republic
Spanking is a time-honoured tradition, one that the COF wishes to celebrate. In one way or the other, it has been used for centuries as a mean of discipline for youngsters and adults, but the spirit of the Games is to focus elsewhere. The COF sees spanking as a wonderful, mutually consensual activity that can bring a thrill and a feeling of closeness – and genuine sport competition, why not. When the Games of the Spanking Olympiad were first held, many criticised the COF’s ideals, and also pointed out that 'it is contradictory to include youngsters given the non-punitive nature of the event'. The COF does not believe that this is against the spirit of the Games, but is instead one of the best movements in order to wipe out the idea of minors being hit for discipline, and to include them in a sane and safe competition. The spirit of the Spanking Olympics is to bring entertainment to everyone through the challenges that professional and amateurish athlete bring to life. The event is televised as always, via satellite on SIN (Spanking International Network). Several commercial sponsors are affiliated with the COF and the Games, and this means free access for everyone in every part of the world, without fees. All those who wish to attend or participate in the next Games – to be held in Prague in 2008 – may contact the COF following directions found at www.spankingolympics.com . Farewell, And Happy Spanking!
The Spanking Olympics are a SPOOF on the regular Olympic games. Nothing of this has ever happened – and is not very likely to happen in the near future, heh. The logo has been created by Haley Brimley with the detail of a picture by Barb. The whole document is exclusive property of Haley Brimley. Contrarily to other works by the author, you are NOT ALLOWED to reproduce or distribute it anywhere without his express consent. Thank you!
Feel free to contact the author at [email protected] for any suggestion and/or comments.
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